James Hirsen
Tuesday, Feb. 1, 2005

THE LEFT COAST REPORT
A Political Look at Hollywood

Angelina Jolie, the "Sexiest Woman Alive" according to an Esquire magazine poll, is thought by many to have been the catalyst for the breakup of Hollywood super-couple Jennifer Anniston and Brad Pitt.

Now it turns out that the "Tomb Raider" star has given a roundabout slap to fellow femme fatale Sharon Stone and some other Hollywood charity activists.

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While attending a global fest in the Swiss ski town of Davos, Stone made the following comment: "Just stand up. Just stand up. People are dying in [Tanzania].... today," Stone said. "And that is not OK with me today."

Stone's chiding of internationalist fat cats at the World Economic Forum resulted in a million dollar's worth of relief money pouring in within five minutes.

Celebs were in big supply at Davos.  Along with Stone, Jolie was there as well as Richard Gere, Bono, Lionel Richie and Peter Gabriel.
 
Tinseltown's fundraising fever is apparently causing some grief on the part of Jolie. She commented on how celebrities might actually be harming the very causes they're trying to advocate.

Jolie said, "I think you can do damage. Celebrities have a responsibility to know absolutely what they're talking about, and to be in it for the long run." 

Jolie ought to know.  For four years she's been a goodwill ambassador to the U.N.'s refugee agency.

Putting aside from the fact that she's hooked up with a bum organization, Jolie deserves credit. She's one of the few people who got the media to focus attention on the deplorable situation in the Sudan. 

After visiting the Sudan's Darfur region, Jolie publicly described the mass murder that's taking place there as "unbelievably horrible."

Meanwhile, back in the states, actress Carmen Electra was doing some fundraising of her own. In an effort to raise money to help tsunami victims, Electra donned a corset and performed with her new burlesque group at the Key Club in West Hollywood.

The Left Coast Report understands that, after learning about Electra's endeavors, Kofi Annan is considering instituting a new U.N. program - "Lap-dancing-for-Food."

Tinseltown Ad Touts Licenses for Lawbreakers

Some Hollywood celebs have taken out an ad in Variety magazine urging California Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger to approve a bill that would allow illegal immigrants to obtain driver's licenses.

Star promoters of licenses for illegals include Martin Sheen, Danny Glover, Diane Keaton, Carlos Santana, Emilio Estevez and Melissa Gilbert.

The Mexican government no doubt appreciates the celebrity support. It's already been working to provide a steady flow of new California drivers by publishing a comic book, which teaches folks how to safely skirt U.S. immigration law. An agency of the Mexican government plans to distribute 1.5 million copies of its book, "The Guide for the Mexican Migrant," in provinces from which many illegals flee.

The Hollywood celebs seem to ignore those pesky little things called law and logic and opt for emotion instead. The Variety ad pictures a Hispanic woman with two young children, with a caption that's tailor-made to pull on heartstrings.

"I am trusted every day to use my hands and my heart to nurture and care for children who are not my own..." the ad reads.  "I am welcomed into the most personal parts of people's lives, but I'm not trusted with a license to drive a car."

The Left Coast Report suggests that celebs might try doing their own leaf blowing with some of that Hollywood hot air.

Robert Redford's Canine Quandary

Cancel the moving vans - again.  Much like fellow Hollywood denizens Alec Baldwin and Robert Altman, Robert Redford was supposed to leave the country and head for Ireland if George W. Bush beat John Kerry in the 2004 presidential election.

Now Redford says, "It wasn't true... I love Ireland, I have family heritage in Ireland, but I'm an American. I love it here and I'm not leaving just because of some barking dog on the TV."

The actor adds, "I'm not going to do that. We are who we are and we're not going to shy away from something we need to stand up for."

The Left Coast Report thinks it's strange that barking bothers Redford -- most of the Hollywood elites have no problem with Barney or Mrs. Beasley.

Michael Moore Calls Condi Confirmation "Disgusting"

A recent Web chat that famed fantasizer Michael Moore had with the U.K.'s Channel 4 was quite revealing.

When Moore was asked why most Democrats voted to confirm Condoleezza Rice as Secretary of State, Moore replied that the vote "was a disgusting sight and indicative of who the Democrats are - they are lazy and they're cowards and I'm just hoping that the more they continue to act like that the more it will encourage Americans to run against them and put the U.S. back in the hands of the working class, where it belongs."

Moore's response to an inquiry about whether he thought Jeb Bush would run for the presidency in 2008 brought more Dem derision. "The Democrats are going to have a very hard time winning the next election," Moore moaned. "The Republicans have a number of star players and the Democrats have a lot of wimps and losers."

Moore's concerns about the future policies of the Bush administration over the next four years were that "they [the Bush administration] are going to try and shift as much wealth from the middle class to the upper class as they can in these next four years - turning the middle class into the working poor. Secondly they are going to attempt various acts of aggression against other countries around the world but they will not all take the form of a ground invasion like they did in Iraq - they have seen the folly in that so they will try other means to commit acts of violence and overthrow Governments."

Moore evidently didn't expect to be asked about why he isn't donating 100% of the money from his movies to the cause he advocates: helping our troops in Iraq.

His answer was vintage Moore. "I haven't seen a dime from this movie!" he declared, adding his own inquiry, "My question then to you is what are you doing to try and stop this war? I will promise you that I will donate as much of my time as I can in the coming months to see that the anti-Bush movement transforms itself into a massive anti-war movement so we can bring these troops home."

The Left Coast Report says once again we see that when Moore's tossed a question about his "working class" wealth, he snaps into a game of verbal dodge ball.

Star Jones Expands

"The View" co-hostess and new red carpet commentator Star Jones recently made a startling announcement. She's going to have the necessary surgery to have her breasts enlarged.

Why? Could it be because a lawyer's group is pressing for a "topless sunbathing" bill in California?

No, it's not because of the proposed "drop your top" legislation.

Could it be that Star's seen too many episodes of "Nip/Tuck?"

No, that's not it either. Jones has revealed that the reason she's seeking to enlarge her upper anatomy is because her new husband Al Reynolds "cares about boobs."

The Left Coast Report hears that the Al Reynolds' rationale may become the new slogan of the DNC.